U G H

Ever since I was little I wanted to be a ballerina. I thought they were so beautiful and graceful and couldn’t imagine doing anything else. As I grew up, I realized there was no way I could be a ballerina because my body is not meant to look the way a ballerina looks. So I left the dream of being a prima ballerina in a well-known performance behind and focused on other endeavors. After a few years went by of always being in front of the class to act out a scene in a book, I realized I was interested in performing. I started taking classes in theatre in seventh grade and kept on going until eleventh. When I reached the age of “it’s not cool to do theatre” I focused on sports but always longed to be a part of a show. I had done small performances here and there with my intermediate and high school, but nothing big until I got to college. When I got to Diablo Valley College, I took a theatre class just for fun. I had no idea that I would enjoy it so much, and actually audition t

Trying to evaluate was it worth it to me Look at every situation Morals, decency you don't want your interaction to be based on garbage, on empty stuff, you want there to be some connection, mentally and emotionally.   Relax Breathe Listen What is this sensation I feel in the palm of my hand.   My blood is racing threw me and I feel like I am going to explode. But I have to catch my breath quickly and quietly and sit back down, because no one wants to hear the sound of my voice.   What is going on?   What is happening to me?   I’ve never felt like this.   Why did I let myself…I don’t even know who I am right now.   But I don’t feel alone. I feel another presence and it feels so strong and I can’t ignore it.   He’s standing right behind me. I feel him next to me. I see him watching me.   Why? Where did he come from why is he here and why cant I ignore him. His presence, his touch, I know I shouldn’t, but I do.   Why can’t I walk away from it?   I’m trapped and I

I started rehearsal with 3 people. Granted there was confusion about the location so 5-10 mins. late was acceptable, BUT  25-30 mins. late is NOT. Also, not letting me know you are running late is NOT acceptable.  I may be your friend outside of rehearsal, but I have to ask you all to respect me enough to show up on time and for some reason if you can not, text me and let me know that too!  There are a few individuals who I had told to join us when they can, which because of their schedule is either because they have work or school, but everyone else should have been there as close to 5 as possible. It is pointless in naming who was "bad" today at rehearsal.  But I want you all to know that I was furious as I rushed out to go to my other rehearsal.  I understand that the material is a lot to throw at you all, but this means EVERYONE must show up to EVERY rehearsal, because otherwise we spend more time reviewing than progressing. Also, I come prepared and I expect you al